• Resident Info
  • Programs
    • Unity Commons
    • Sergio's
    • REST
    • Sandy's Flats
    • Navigation Team
    • Training
    • Education
  • About
  • Get Involved
    • Volunteer
    • Shelter Meals
    • Donate
    • Jobs
  • Contact
  • Blog
IW SHELTER
  • Resident Info
  • Programs
    • Unity Commons
    • Sergio's
    • REST
    • Sandy's Flats
    • Navigation Team
    • Training
    • Education
  • About
  • Get Involved
    • Volunteer
    • Shelter Meals
    • Donate
    • Jobs
  • Contact
  • Blog

In Memory of Sandra Betz

5/30/2017

9 Comments

 

It never gets easier.

On Sunday May 28th, we lost another beautiful shelter guest. I don't remember the first time I met Sandy, exactly. At least not in a specific date or time kind of way. I do remember in that kind of way when someone comes into your life and you are forever changed for knowing them, though. Sandy is truly unforgettable. There are so many things to remember: Her style, her purses, her impeccably died hair (and the staining of the shelter bathroom sinks with hair dye), her love for makeup and the dignity she felt when she could really put her face on.... that fierceness to advocate for herself and to not let the injustice she was experiencing go unnoticed... the sweet
Picture
Sandy and Sadie. Sadie is an original shelter staff and was Sandy's Navigator. They worked very closely together.
love when she was calm and would say that she knew how much we cared.... her love for a good, dirty joke and the belly laugh that would accompany it... her voice on the phone when she would call to check in. ​As one of our staff Jeanne put it, "I'll be damned if we all aren't better off for knowing Sandy", and it's so true. 

Sandy began staying with us on December 23rd, 2014. As one of our longest term guests, we have certainly seen her through a lot. Over the time we've been working with Sandy she's been housed twice and returned to us, struggled through major medical issues and infections that have resulted in significant hospitalizations, had all of her belongings stolen multiple times, been dropped by service providers and continued to struggle to find stability in a world that does not know how to hold her in all her light, love and complication.  Most recently, Sandy had been staying in a local hotel trying to get her massive leg wound to heal after she was discharged from the hospital. Once, when her leg was really bad, the ER told her care advocate from Amahoro House, Angela, that she wouldn't be admitted to the hospital because she was homeless. Another time Sandy was (mistakenly) told her leg was going to get amputated when she was all alone in the hospital. These instances highlight the invisible battles that people experiencing homelessness are engaged in at every turn. Medical providers, first responders, law enforcement, social workers, case managers and other providers struggle deeply to meet people where they are at in all their complexities. Provider willingness to live up to their professional charge to care for every person equally, does not always extend to our guests. However, between Sadie, our amazing partners the Amahoro House team, Melinda and Jerry the hotel caretakers, and a few dedicated friends from her street family, she was supported nearly everyday with calls, food, appointment coordination, transportation, wound care and emotional support. ​

Like I mentioned earlier, this never gets easier. Whenever we lose someone, we find ourselves experiencing an all at once shocking heartbreak, and a profoundly familiar grief. We don't know a lot about Sandy's family and when the coroner was bringing her out on the stretcher it was our team who was there. We hope that they find her family, but we may never know that outcome. We are the kind of family that the structured world doesn't know how to categorize. Sandy is the 7th shelter guest who passed away since we opened our doors. When we talk about the issue of homelessness -- so politicized and always seemingly up for debate -- as a life or death matter, it's because it truly is. Many of you may recognize Sandy. This was her home... her community.  She frequented the Reef, the library, parks, the senior center and other downtown spots. When we talk about addressing homelessness as life and death it's not abstract for us. It's people we love deeply. We know their favorite ice cream flavor and what movies they love. We know just where they keep their teeth/socks/purse/umbrella/family keepsakes/etc., we know what kinds of shoes make their feet sore and what makes them laugh. We know their deep heartaches and struggles. We sit vigil by their bedsides and accompany them as their bodies are mounted to the gurney. We deeply mourn their deaths and our lives never feel the same when they are gone. 

I want to extend my deepest love and support to people who are currently or recently experiencing homelessness who stood by Sandy in all her beauty and her messiness. You all make life so much better for all of us and I am honored to share community with you everyday--whether up close or from afar, you are always in my heart and thoughts.

Thank you to the hotel staff for working with us, thank you to the Amahoro House for stepping up so much for our people all the time. Thank you to the service providers who did go above and beyond for her over the years (Ty, PATH, SideWalk). Thank you to the many community members, restaurant servers and businesses who treated Sandy with respect and dignity and gave her a second chance when she wasn't at her best. Thank you to our staff (especially Sadie and former staff people Pete & Jiva, her navigators) for always inviting her back with love and patience even when it was challenging to maintain. Thank you to First Christian and for giving us a home, and particularly to Mary for letting Sandy use the bathrooms and warm up so often.

​Moments like these, the reality of what we are carrying with people in that 100 year old church basement feels enormous. It's a privilege and an honor that I will never fully understand. I am grateful that you are no longer in pain, Sandy. You made a serious impact on many lives and you will not be forgotten.  <3 <3 <3

Picture
Sandy's shelter bed.
9 Comments
    Meg Martin

    Author

    Meg Martin, LICSW, CPC, is the Executive Director for The Interfaith Works.


    Archives

    March 2022
    December 2021
    September 2021
    November 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    March 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    November 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    February 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    May 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014


    Categories

    All
    Current
    Gratitude
    News

    RSS Feed

SITE MAP
Introduction
Guests
Shelter
Navigation Team
Training
Education
About
Volunteer
Donate
Jobs
Contact
Blog
Shelter Front Desk
(360) 918-8424

Emergency Shelter Hotline
1 (844) 628-7343
Picture
Privacy Policy
Location

QUICK LINKS
Donate Cash
Wish List
Volunteer Calendar
Staff Login
2017 © Debi Bodett

Please support the businesses that so generously support us.
Our Sponsors
  • Resident Info
  • Programs
    • Unity Commons
    • Sergio's
    • REST
    • Sandy's Flats
    • Navigation Team
    • Training
    • Education
  • About
  • Get Involved
    • Volunteer
    • Shelter Meals
    • Donate
    • Jobs
  • Contact
  • Blog